Another week down and we are half-way through the year. I wonder who kept their New Year’s resolutions … I wonder who even remembers what they were 😊
If you are one of those people that make resolutions or important life decisions on January 1st , remember that ANY day of the year can be ‘January 1st ‘. It is never too late to start and there is no limit to how many times you can start over again. It is only a decision away – “I will until…”. Like so many things in life, everyone can, but only a few of us will.
“A negative mind will NEVER create a positive future…”
So, what is it that makes some people give up and others keep going? Do some of us just have it ‘in us’ and others not? Or is that an excuse? Is it persistence alone? Or is there more?
Maybe it’s a combination of things including persistence, resilience and determination but not exclusive to these. I think it takes an iron clad ‘Why’ AND having enough skin in the game. I have realised that when we go into something with all care and no responsibility and perhaps no plan or a plan but with no accountability, we absolve ourselves of the responsibility to succeed.
It is easy then to feel somewhat removed when facing the consequences and negative outcomes as a result. This allows us to not own them. ‘It wasn’t my fault, it was because of …’ , ‘It was an unconscious decision therefore it wasn’t me. I had no control.’ There are too many stories of people that felt like they also had no control that have gone on to greatness and overcome incredible challenges. It’s just so much easier to make excuses, lay blame and live by default than to live deliberately and with integrity. That way we don’t need to face ourselves.
When we are deliberate about our choices and booby trap ourselves into success, in my case avoiding triggers that remind me of more painful times, we choose more wisely. The obese person trying to lose weight ALWAYS has the choice to eat the pizza … or not. They have a choice to do something else – go for a walk, wash the car or even call someone and say, ‘hey I’m going to eat a pizza, I can’t resist, can you distract me for a bit?’. It is usually when we pretend to be Robinson Crusoe and go it alone that we run into problems. Often our own willpower is not enough.
So, everyone makes their own choices and for those of us with enough skin in the game and maybe a more vested interest in the bigger picture, a stronger WHY, we are more persistent, develop a higher resistance and are more determined… and perhaps we choose more wisely.
When we truly feel there is enough at stake, we are conscious that our every single decision matters and will contribute to the outcome. Only then is there enough of a reason to choose deliberately.
Life is a game of two steps forward one step back. Embrace it or reject it, it is what it is.
Oh, and if you think the Universe doesn’t have a way of reminding you – think again!
To my angel who always managed to show empathy and compassion for people despite never having walked in their shoes. You taught me the true meaning of unconditional love.
Dalya xx 💙