And in a blink, here we are – January 1st, 2023. What a year 2022 was…
As I take some moments to think about my own year gone by, I can’t help but wonder what this new one will bring. What exciting things will happen, where will I go, what will I do, and if I could create it all, what would it look like?
If you want to do something you have never done,
you have to do something you have never done.
I think about my highs? And my lows?
What made me smile? What brought me joy?
What made me cry? What brought me deep sadness?
What drained me and what energised and exhilarated me?
And what did I take away from each and every one of these experiences?
January the 1st is traditionally the day we make New Year’s resolutions. To be honest, I’m not a fan. I’m all for setting goals, (or rather intentions), but can’t help but feel the ones we set on January 1st are also the ones we are most likely never to achieve.
Most of us will have had a bit of a break over the last few weeks and we are feeling rested and replenished. What a perfect time to make huge resolutions that we can’t possibly manage once we are busy again, (or overwhelmed). We are then left with a bunch of well-intended goals and timeframes, we know we want to achieve, but can’t possibly sustain the activity required.
I think also that setting a New Year’s resolution is traditional and not all traditions are valuable nor do they serve us. Perhaps it’s time to create some new ones?
What I get huge benefit from at this time of year, is reflecting and looking at what I do and don’t want in the coming year. Yes, what my intentions are, as opposed to my goals. And YES there is a difference.
A goal (or resolution) might be considered to be a hard and fast commitment that is either achieved or broken and its focus is generally outside of ourselves. Ie. lose weight, find a career you love, find that special person to have an intimate relationship with, save x dollars for y purpose etc.
An intention is something that is more internally focussed, something we can feel. Ie. Improving my health vs losing weight, finding purpose in my life vs finding a career, becoming a better version of myself (that will attract like) vs finding someone to ‘complete’ me. Intentions excite us from within.
You can’t do something new by doing old things.
If you want your life to change, you have to change your life.
Perhaps the other reason so many people feel like they never achieve their goals (or NY resolutions) is that they never take the time to clearly define what they want or what their dreams actually are. In order to make any changes or improve any aspect of our life, we need to be clear on where we are currently, and WHY we want the change. Not just why, but what does it really mean to us, what will be the result of not changing and what are we prepared to do to get the result we desire.
I came across this story recently and it made me smile – and gave me hope. I hope it inspires you as well.
Once upon a time… there lived a seriously cute blond-haired blue-eyed boy who was about 8 years old at the time and in the second grade. He decided to take on the difficult task of putting together a soccer group with as many kids as possible, in the hope of creating several teams. The teacher had told him, if he could achieve this, they would consider incorporating it into the weekly schedule.
I know right, big goal for someone his age! But this boy was no ordinary 8yo. He was passionate, driven and focussed and also part of a line of generations that all believed they could achieve anything they wanted to if they put their mind to it.
If you want to go somewhere you have never gone,
you have to go somewhere you have never gone.
One day he came home with a huge smile on his face and proudly announced he had 52 people join the soccer group. His mother instantly curious as there had been little interest up until this point asked how on earth he had done that??
He beamed, “I just went around to all the year 2 classes and told them what we were doing and that one of the other year 2 classes were interested and we were now asking everyone else”.
She smiled, “Surely not everyone was interested in soccer though?”
“No, not everyone was… but 52 were!”
How incredibly proud of him she was and always will be. #foreverbenshaw.
As you enter 2023 may you move into unchartered lands and have incredible adventures, and fantastic experiences that take your breath away. And may you set many intentions (not goals) of who you want to be and how you want to live.
Dalya xx 💙