I heard a speaker many years ago talking about how it’s, all about the dash, 2002 – 2017.
“For it matters not how much we own, the cars, the house, the cash.
What matters is how we lived and loved and how we spent our dash”.
I don’t know if this dash is ever more highlighted than when someone we love dies. As we think about their life and how they lived it, the impact they had on others and perhaps the world, we inevitably turn to reflect on our own dash – and how we are living it.
I guess it’s all part of the ‘game’ that we never know how long we have left. If I had the choice, I wouldn’t want to know anyway.
We are each presented with a multitude of opportunities every day, every hour, every minute, to arrange how that dash will look. It’s up to us to create the details between our dates.
Show compassion for others,
not because they deserve it,
but as a reflection of who YOU are
As we find ourselves full swing into the silly season, my thoughts are with those who face these holidays without their loved ones – specifically those whose child(ren) has died. It can often seem like the world has gone completely mad as I watch in disbelief at the insanity perpetuated and engaged in at this time of year.
People racing around frantically preparing for December 25th, (which can be just another day if you choose it to be), spending money they don’t have, buying presents for people they don’t really like and don’t really want to spend time with. This is aside from the incredible pile of waste created from ridiculous amounts of food that is only bought at this time of the year. Food that ends up being thrown out without a second thought along with so many of the important things that matter in life – many of which were cast aside when the madness first began.
This time of year brings heightened emotions for many. In an effort to keep busier than ever, I find myself sitting in the quiet my eyes filled with tears of mental and emotional tiredness. The ache in my heart for missing Ben is suffocating and literally takes my breath away. If I’m honest, I don’t want my busy’ness any other way as this coping mechanism works for me. And I always welcome thoughts of Ben, no matter the intensity, as a reminder of the impact of his dash … and now mine.
This week I want to include a beautiful poem I came across but before I do, allow me to express my sincere gratitude to many of you reading this.
It’s no secret there has been a big push for the Precious Wings Honour an Angel campaign. Numerous posts have been created and reminders sent daily, often multiple times. Understand that the goal is not simply to raise a lot of money.
The goal is to ensure that every family that loses a child over the next few weeks and months knows that they are not alone and receives our support.
I am a big believer in affirmations but also know that like Post-It notes stuck around the house, they don’t get seen after a period of time. I know there is the likelihood that my posts (and others) are just being overlooked or not ‘seen’.
So, thank you to those who did take action and clicked on the link to donate. Your activity makes a significant difference. You have contributed in a powerful and positive way to someone else’s dash… as well as your own.
Know that when the moon comes out and you lay in the darkness, or you stand on your balconies watching the summer storms roll by, you have made a difference. A difference that is priceless and impossible to put a dollar value on.
So I will finish today by saying, the anonymous donor has extended their support, and all donations made until 9am Monday 12th December to Honour an Angel, WILL BE MATCHED. Your donations are still being doubled.
I read of a man who stood to speak at the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on the tombstone from the beginning…to the end.
He noted first the date of birth and spoke of the following date with tears
but said what mattered most of all, was the dash between those years.
For that little dash, it represents the time spent alive on earth
and now only those who loved him, know what the little line is worth.
For it matters not, how much we own, the cars…the house…the cash.
What matters is how we lived and loved and how we spend our dash.
So, think about this long and hard; are there things you’d like to change?
For you never know how much time is left that can still be rearranged.
To be less quick to anger and show appreciation more
and love the people in our lives like we’ve never loved before.
Treat each other with respect and more often wear a smile…
remembering that this dash might only last a little while.
So, when your eulogy is being read, with your life’s actions to rehash,
will you be proud of the things they say about how you lived your dash?
– Linda Ellis
Dalya xx 💙