Every decision you make and every step you take (or don’t take) will directly contribute to your future.
Time waits for no one. It’s a case of going…ready or not.
We don’t get to choose the hand we are dealt, only how we play our cards.
It stands to reason then that most of our time should be spent on the things that are most important to us or that contribute to our goals or … finding our purpose.
We have all read about finding our purpose. The headlines yell, Find your purpose! How do you find purpose? 7 ways to find your purpose! How excellent would it be if it was that easy, read a post, find your purpose!
There is no clear-cut answer. Definitely, no magic pill that miraculously identifies it. And, it takes time – sometimes a LOT of time, often a lifetime to figure it out.
I believe that we are all created as unique individuals and no two people are the same. No two people have the same value to offer, and our value is tied to who we are. This could explain the thousands of amazing and successful people all working in one niche or genre.
I think that our purpose is connected to our individual value offering. Finding it seems to be largely trial and error and via a process of elimination, but experience tells me there are more than a few signposts to help along the way.
Your purpose will feel good.
So, it makes sense to do more of the things that energise us, excite us, and uplift us. More of the things that bring us (and others) joy and fulfillment.
Our purpose will always have the side effect of adding value or empowering others.
Maybe it’s only after we die when people look back, that they know what our lives were really all about. Is our purpose directly related to how we will be remembered? The values and legacy we leave behind?
I think it takes having many experiences over the course of our time, that bring us closer to what is already inside us.
And something I read recently took a huge amount of pressure off…
“You do not choose your purpose any more than you choose your ideas.”
What if that compelling feeling that drives you to do something, that voice in your head that speaks to you, that urge that you feel, that great idea that just magically pops into your mind but somehow feels like it was always part of you – what if ALL these are the signposts we are supposed to follow?
Our gut instinct is more powerful than we realise and these moments of instinct are important. Often the first feeling you have before making a big decision is the right one. But then this would take a level of self-awareness.
You don’t find your purpose, you uncover it, make friends with it, and build on it.
A monastery in Thailand was being relocated by a group of monks. One day while they were moving a giant clay Buddha, one of the monks noticed a large crack in the clay.
On closer inspection, he saw there was a golden sparkle shining through the crack. The monk felt a surge of excitement and carefully chipped at the clay exterior. As pieces of clay fell away, it revealed that the statue was in fact made of solid gold.
It is believed that the giant Buddha had been covered with clay by Thai monks hundreds of years earlier to protect it from an enemy attack. During the attack, all the monks were killed and it wasn’t until centuries later that the statue was rediscovered.
What if the reason our purpose is not obvious, is because it’s buried under years of life’s clay, perhaps the thickest layer of which is our own limiting self-beliefs.
It is almost always an occurrence in our life, a tragedy, a health scare, or a life-changing event, losing a child will definitely do it! that forces us to chip at the clay. Something inside hounds us to find meaning. It drives us to (re)discover what we are passionate about.
Curiosity or a feeling of overwhelming desperation prompts us to take action and this action takes us one step closer to our purpose.
When we try new things, we reveal skills and abilities we didn’t know we had and we discover things we didn’t know we were ‘a natural’ at. We become excited and invigorated and I am sure this is a sign that we are one step closer to where we are supposed to be going.
When you lose a child you get an overwhelming and powerful desire to make their life count. There is an unstoppable drive to make a difference and to make life matter. It’s not even a conscious choice, but more internal power and strength that seems to come from nowhere, but you can’t ignore it. You have no clue exactly what you are supposed to do, but you know with crystal clarity you have to do something.
I can’t tell you for sure what my purpose is, but I can tell you that certain activities feel right. This is my guide to know that I am heading in the right direction. It’s like that ‘you’re getting warmer, your getting colder’ game we used to play as kids. As long as I keep following the good feeling, I get a little warmer and hopefully a little closer.
So, how DO you find your purpose? No one can answer this for you. There are simply signposts for you to follow along the way.
Next time you feel energised, or you feel huge exhilaration and absolute joy, incredibly thrilled and even when you close your eyes you can’t stop smiling, stop and look at what you are doing at that moment.
If you are adding value or uplifting someone, take a moment to recognise this. It might just be one of the signposts you are looking for.
Dalya xx 💙